


Everything That I Am

by softSnowdrop



Category: RWBY
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Happy Ending, One Shot, Underlying themes of mental illness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-07
Updated: 2018-04-07
Packaged: 2019-04-19 21:19:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,922
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14245977
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/softSnowdrop/pseuds/softSnowdrop
Summary: "Remember how General Ironwood told me that sometimes, after a battle, you'll see things that aren't there?" Yang said softly, her gaze shifting between Weiss and Blake. "Well, yeah, obviously that can affect someone a long time after a battle has passed... But... You guys don't think that's what's going on with Ruby, right?"Weiss was the first to speak up. "Yang, we had complete faith in you whenever you said that you saw Mercury attack you. I think we should give Ruby the same treatment when she says that she saw Penny.""I'm not saying I doubt her--just... I'm worried about her. Plus, it was a crowd--what if it's someone that just looked like her. I don't want her to get her hopes up, look around, and then just... End up heartbroken."





	Everything That I Am

                Through the heavy, afternoon Atlas crowd, Ruby Rose could’ve sworn that she saw ginger hair, and atop it, a bow of pink. She knew, for a fact, what she saw— _who_ she saw—but by the time she had rushed through the crowd, gently nudging people aside as she frantically scanned and searched for the familiar figure, she could find nobody even akin to who she had seen.

                From behind her, familiar voices echoed her name—they were drowned out not by the noise of the city, but by the shattering of Ruby’s heart.

 

                It had been a little over a year since she had last seen Penny—well, seen Penny die. She had escaped Mercury right in time to witness it firsthand—and it never really left her mind. Not only had Pyrrha’s death haunted her, but so did Penny’s.

                At this point, she wasn’t sure which death haunted her more; her greatest strength was her speed, and she wasn’t fast enough to save two of her loved ones.

 

                When a familiar face grabbed Ruby’s shoulder and turned her to face them, she didn’t process it at first; of course, she knew that she had been spun around to look at an older man, his hair pushed back and greying in places, with tired eyes that locked on her. Of course, she knew he was saying “Thank the gods, there you are, kiddo. Thought we lost ya.” But the words, nor his identity, wasn’t processed immediately.

                She swallowed hard, and slowly looked back over her shoulder at the crowd that had reformed. When she saw nothing, she looked up at her Uncle, tears welling in her silver eyes as she did so. “Uncle Qrow, I could’ve sworn that I saw Penny.” She murmured softly. “I know I saw her.”

                Seeing his niece so heartbroken, Qrow’s face softened with genuine caring and concern. “Hey, you’re tired after the long walk here. We all are, I think you we should all get to some beds so we can catch some shut-eye.”

                Her shoulders dropped at the suggestion—she hadn’t imagined Penny’s visage from sleep deprivation and exhaustion—she knew that she had been real, tangible—that she had been lost to the fast-moving crowd. She wanted to protest, and while she knew that he was partially right, she knew that what he was implying was wrong.

                He didn’t see her. He couldn’t have. He barely knew her, he wouldn’t recognize her even if he did see her.

                Regardless, she gave a small nod, and glanced around him as the others approached them.

                “I managed to find an inn down the street behind us,” Ren said, looking between Ruby and Qrow. “Will that be—”

                “More than perfect. Thanks, kid.” Qrow slowly raised his hand from Ruby’s shoulder and ruffled her hair, earning a small, tired smile from her. “Thanks for looking while the rest of us found Ruby.”

                “It was my pleasure.”

 

                Walking back to the inn, Weiss, Yang, and Blake were certain to stick as close to Ruby as they could—Blake following behind while Yang and Weiss walked alongside of her.

                “Ruby, what were you thinking, running off like that?” Weiss scolded her quietly, occasionally glancing over at her as they walked through the street. “If you got lost, it would be the _biggest_ pain to find you again—” Her expression softened, and she slowly turned to face forward as she continued. “and I really don’t want to lose any of you ever again.”

                “I just. I saw Penny.”

                Yang’s expression shifted from confusion to sympathy in the blink of an eye—she furrowed her brow, and slowly reached a hand out to wrap around her baby sister’s shoulders. “Ruby, you’re just under a lot of stress right now, and we haven’t taken much of a break from travelling here lately, you—”

                “I’m not just seeing things!” Ruby snapped, tears once again filling her eyes. “Yang, I know what I saw—I know who I saw, this was her home—she lived here, what if… What if they rebuilt her?”

                Weiss flinched at the outburst, but regardless, she spoke up. “Ruby, I know you want to believe that… But I just don’t think it’s plausible.” She paused, raising her head and looking back at Blake, then to Yang, and then directly at Ruby. “I know what you want to see. We’ve all been through a lot over the past year, we’ve all seen and heard things that weren’t really there.”

                Ruby whimpered, moving her hands over her eyes in a feeble attempt to push back tears. She didn’t speak; the silence earned glances between Weiss, Blake, and Yang once again.

                Yang stayed silent—unsure how to comfort her sister, but kept her arm around Ruby’s shoulders and gave her a gentle squeeze.

                Blake drew a deep breath before hesitantly speaking up. “Weiss, is there any way that you can somehow find Penny’s dad?” She didn’t want to instill false hope in Ruby—but she didn’t want to wait until later to ask. “I think that, maybe if she talked to him, she could find closure.” She turned her head back facing-forward before pulling her scroll out from her dress’s sash.

                Weiss glanced over her shoulder to speak directly to Blake. “I’m not sure if I can, but if I can get in touch with General Ironwood, I’m sure that I could at least try to contact her.”

_I don’t need closure, I need Penny. She’s alive, she’s okay, I know it._ Ruby thought to herself.

                “Listen, I know we’ve been sleeping with our mats pressed as close together as we could have them,” Yang spoke up, a sly grin curling on her lips as she did so. “But are we gonna room together here, too, or?”

                “Of course.” Weiss rolled her eyes, her fingers delicately tapping on her scroll’s screen. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

                “I think it would be for the best.” A small smile crossed Blake’s lips as she spoke up. “Considering I haven’t been back with you all for more than a few months.”

                “It’ll be almost just like old times.” Ruby murmured, sniffling and drawing a deep breath—an attempt to compose herself once again. “It feels great to have Team RWBY back together.”

                “I couldn’t agree more.” Weiss said, closing her scroll and folding it back into her sash. “I’ve missed you guys.”

                “I know we talk about it a lot—how much we’ve missed each other, but it really feels like I couldn’t say it enough.” Blake added, a quiet chuckle catching in her throat.

                “Seriously, when I went to find my mom to find Ruby, I never expected to find Weiss.” Yang grinned, now ruffling Ruby’s hair. “But when I did, I was so relieved. When she hugged me, I nearly started crying right then and there—”

                “But you didn’t.” Weiss interrupted, rolling her eyes and smiling.

                “No, but you sure as hell did.”

                “Hey!”

                “You also started crying when Yang and I hugged you.” Ruby added, a small smile crossing her lips as she looked over at Weiss.

                “Okay, I did. And?”

                “You also started crying after our fight at Haven. When we were all sitting on the floor and just holding each other?” Blake chimed in—wearing the same sly smile as the other two.

                “Okay, yes, I cry. A lot. So?”

                “It’s great to see you so emotional.” Yang reached over Ruby’s shoulders, giving Weiss a gentle shoulder nudge. “You never cried that much at Beacon, unless you were frustrated. It’s kind of nice seeing you so overwhelmed with happiness.”

                Weiss’s shoulders relaxed at the comment, and a small smile crossed her lips—but only briefly. She quickly turned her head, her ponytail swishing and accidentally smacking Ruby in the back of her own head. “You act like I was never happy at Beacon.” She huffed.

                “Nah, we’ve just never seen you cry from being so happy before.” Yang grinned, giving her shoulder another nudge.

                “Kids, hey.” Qrow called, holding a keycard. “I’ve got your pass to your room; it has two beds in it.”

                Ruby whined softly. “Can’t we just push the beds together?”

                Qrow looked between the receptionist, the other members of the group, and Team RWBY before sighing as the receptionist shook his head. He gently put his hands on the shoulders of Ruby and Yang, and used them to lead the other two a bit away from the front desk. “Listen, I’m not stopping you from doing that. Just be sure to put the ‘do not disturb’ sign up before we leave in the morning, and be sure to put the beds back before we leave for good. Alright?”

                Of course, the sisters lit up at his response.

                “Hell yeah, of course!” Yang grinned, pumping her fist in the air.

                “Keep it down!” Weiss fussed, putting a hand on Yang’s bicep and slowly lowering her arm. “Don’t attract attention to us, geez.”

 

                Ruby and Yang were the last two in the room; Weiss had gone out to meet with General Ironwood about finding Penny’s father, and Blake had gone to Sun and Ilia’s room to talk to them—and to make sure Ilia was alright.

                Yang had already pushed the two beds together and tossed all of the pillows and blankets onto it in the messiest pile she possibly could have made—all so that she could sprawl out on half of the bed and still be within an arms-length of her sister, who had curled up under her cape—with her hood up and her back to Yang.

                She had expressed that she wasn’t angry, that she just wanted to be quiet for awhile.

                “Hey, sis?” Yang spoke, breaking a long-running silence. “I’m sorry if like. We made it sound like we thought you were crazy when you said you saw Penny.”

                Her words continued to earn silence.

                “You don’t have to respond to me, but listen, okay?”

                Ruby shuffled her legs a bit before rolling over, now facing Yang and staring at her with her bright, mirror-esque eyes. She stayed silent, but Yang knew by her expression that she was listening.

                “After I lost my arm, I saw things that weren’t there—I heard them, I dreamed about them. Hell, I _felt_ things that weren’t there, sometimes. It would get so much worse if I didn’t sleep, too.” She paused, scanning her sister’s face, and she tried to keep her own composure. “It… Wasn’t fun. It was hell, really. But, dad suggested that I used my scroll—take pictures, videos—if I had heard or saw something, but wasn’t sure if it was just my traumatized ass beating itself up or if it were real, that might help.”

                She slowly sat up, wrapping her arms around her knees while keeping her gaze locked on Ruby. “Next time you see her, do me a favor and try to take a picture or a video of her? If she’s really there—you’ll see her in the footage.” She hesitated again. “It’s not that I don’t believe you—I just. Want you to know if what you’re seeing is real. I don’t want you to chase a ghost and get yourself heartbroken when you can’t find her, y’know, sis?”

_A metaphorical ghost, but. Still a ghost, I guess._ Yang added silently to herself.

                The words stung at Ruby’s entire being for a moment, and of course, tears started falling down the bridge of her nose, and onto the bed. She started sniffling, quiet sobs catching in her throat as she held them back to the best of her abilities.

                But she knew Yang was right. She curled herself into a tighter ball, and sobbed out a very quiet “Yeah, I’ll try.”

                Yang watched silently, unsure about herself in the moment. But she slowly lowered her knees and outstretched her arms, and after a deep, shaky breath, spoke again. “C’mere. I’ll hold you, and we can cry?”

                With that, Ruby slowly sat up and crawled closer to her sister—throwing her arms around her and clinging to her, sobbing violently after she found a place to hide in her shoulder.

                Yang held back her own tears at first—her sister’s wellbeing was her priority, after all—and slowly put her arms around Ruby, drawing another unsteady breath. “I’m here, okay, Ruby? Whatever it is, I’m here. We’re all here for you. You’ve got all of us, and we’re not going _anywhere_ without you, okay?”

                Ruby only nodded again.

 

                By the time night had come, everyone had gone from exhausted to extremely exhausted. Ruby, Weiss, Blake, and Yang all huddled close in the pushed-together beds; Ruby’s arms sprawled out—one dangling precariously off of the edge of the bed, the other across Weiss’s stomach; Weiss curled up on her side, facing Blake, her cheek laying against Blake’s arm as a secondary pillow; Blake was on her back, an arm—now numb—under Weiss’s head, and her other arm draped across her own stomach—underneath Yang’s arm; Yang, asleep on her own side, facing Blake with her arm draped around her—her hand reaching across her to cling to Weiss’s nightgown.

                It had been Ruby’s idea to sleep in the order of their team name; it was an idea that nobody objected to. In fact, they’ve alternated sleeping positions constantly since they got back together.

                Sleep had been better, heavier, more refreshing since they had all been reunited—it seemed like with every time they gained an old friend again, sleep came to them a little bit easier.

                Except, not so much tonight—not for Ruby, at least. Instead of snoring heavily all night long, her first night in Atlas ended early, in a shaking, cold sweat, before the clock had even struck four. After she had soothed herself, she slowly sat up—scanning the dimly-lit room for anything that might help her relax.

                Waking her teammates wasn’t an option—they needed their rest. The television was an option, so was listening to music on her scroll—she could read, too, but nothing seemed appealing to her. Nothing except the balcony through the clear, sliding-door window inside of the room.

                She slowly moved out of bed—the mattress shifting and earning a groan from Weiss. Ruby stared at her for a moment, waiting, making sure she hadn’t woken up, before she slowly tiptoed around the bed and to the balcony door. The lock made a soft _click_ when she moved it, and the door made a rather unnerving creak as she cracked it just enough to step outside into the chilly, night air.

                She inhaled deeply, shivering in her tank top and pajama pants. _I should’ve grabbed my cape._ She thought to herself, slowly moving to rest her arms on the _freezing_ , metal bars of the balcony. Despite the discomfort the cold brought her in the moment, she felt alive, she felt real—the world felt crisp and right under the starless city-sky.

                Light pollution wasn’t something she was accustomed to, nor was it something she liked, but she couldn’t complain—not when she, for the first time she had arrived in Atlas, felt _okay_.

                Below her, she saw something moving—but brushed it off as just an animal, or just someone walking home late at night.

                Compared to the day, something about Atlas felt so peaceful at night—it was almost eerie, almost uncomfortable—but the still peace was something Ruby welcomed. It was something she didn’t see often.

                Something clanked below her—it sounded like garbage cans being toppled over, and a muffled scream.

                Ruby peered over the balcony, and saw a faded, green glow, illuminating a figure; the glow had outstretched onto the figure’s sides and neck—hell, ever their eyes gave a faint, green glow.

                And something caught Ruby’s eye, making her peer just a little bit farther off of the ledge—she could’ve sworn that, in the faint glow of a nearby streetlamp, a pink bow caught her eye.

                “Penny?” She said aloud, leaning forward even further and squinting—felt her feet raise off of the cold concrete of the balcony as she leaned over further—but she quickly caught and righted herself.

                Had she lost herself a moment longer, she would’ve fallen—and this wasn’t a height that she would survive the fall from. She held tight to the bars, feeling the cold ground beneath her now-flat feet and acknowledging it in an attempt to ground herself; her hands chilled and turned white at her intense grip combining with the cold sensation.

_I’m losing it, it wasn’t Penny_. She whispered to herself. _I can’t get a picture from here, but…_ She looked down again, her grip on the bars relentless. _They’re gone, anyway._ She drew a deep breath, and tried to contain her heart from leaping out of her own chest from the fall that she had nearly suffered.

                “I think,” She spoke to herself, slowly taking a backwards step towards the door to the room. “I think that I’d better just. Go lay down again.” She reached for the door behind her back, twisted the handle to open it with the unsettling creak, and slowly backed herself inside. She never took her eyes off of the landscape beyond the balcony—a part of her still hoped to see the glowing figure reveal themselves as Penny. A part of her hoped to see them walk down the street, moving through the light provided by a streetlamp.

                But it never happened. No matter how long she stood there—the few minutes that she stood there felt like hours—nobody ever passed by. No more clanks, nothing. Just a dim, icy world before her.  
“Ruby?” Blake slowly rose, carefully sliding her arm out from under the still-sleeping Weiss’s head. “Are you feeling okay?” She asked softly. She considered climbing out of bed, since rolling wasn’t an option, but she remained seated, watching the other with reflective, golden eyes.

                “I—I’m fine. I’m fine, Blake.” Ruby whispered, rubbing her bare, chilled arm.

                “You’re shivering—were you outside?” Her ears flicked, and Ruby could see her scanning her face in the dim light—well, it was dim to her. _Blake can see me just fine like this…_ She thought to herself.

                “I just wanted some fresh air, is all.” Ruby murmured, slowly and carefully sitting herself on the edge of the bed next to Weiss. “It’s… Really cold out here.”

                “It is… Listen, Ruby.” Blake eased herself to the foot of the bed, leaving her legs hanging off of it just barely enough for her toes to touch the floor. “I’ll make you some hot chocolate, and myself some tea, and we can sit up for a little while, if you want?” She paused, glancing back at the other two, still fast asleep. “We can sit in the hall, if you don’t want to risk waking them up, if you want…?”

                Ruby nodded slowly, rubbing her arms again in a failed attempt to get them warm. She watched Blake slide off the bed and get her red cape; when it was offered to her, Ruby took it, and quickly bundled herself. “Thanks, Blake.”

                “The front desk has some hot chocolate packets and some tea bags. I’ll be back in a few minutes, alright?”

                Ruby nodded again, and then watched as Blake left the room—the light from the hall filtered in, just enough to catch part of Ruby’s face as she left.

 

                She had sat herself out in the hallway, against the wall next to the cracked door of their room. Blake was inside, using the coffee pot to fix the drinks; Ruby heard it gurgling from where she sat, but tried to drown it out.

                She rested the back of her head against the wall, and tried to think of anything but Penny. Anything.

                But ever since she landed in Atlas, Penny had been stuck on her mind. She would see something, and she would think to herself: “Wow! Penny would like that.” She would hear a melody, or she would smell something, and think back to something involving Penny.

                She was heartbroken, even a year later, and she didn’t know what else to do. She had thought about them every day, but now it just hurt so, so much.

                “Ruby?” Blake spoke up, holding two mugs in her hand; she slowly sat down next to Ruby and passed the mug along to her. “Sorry if it took me a minute—I wanted to clean the coffee pot before I made my tea.”

                “It’s fine, really…” Ruby carefully leaned against Blake, holding her own drink to her lips, but never actually taking a sip. “Thanks a ton for being here for me, Blake.”

                “I’m always here for you.” She said, taking a sip of her minty-smelling tea and sitting it next to her before putting an arm around Ruby. “We all love you.” She smiled a bit. “You’re our leader. We wouldn’t have gotten anywhere with you, you know.”

                “Pff. Really?” Ruby smiled, curling closer to Blake and taking a drink of her hot chocolate. “Ow—ow, hot,”

                “Careful.” Blake chuckled softly, lightly tousling Ruby’s hair. Her smile slowly faded, and she hesitated to speak again. “Ruby…” She flashed back to the first night she met Ruby, how Ruby had shown her kindness, and somehow managed to begin breaking her walls down the minute they _actually_ spoke. “Do you want to talk about what’s bothering you? If you don’t want to, I get it. But… We’ve all been through a lot. Yang told me that you… Didn’t really get a chance to talk about what happened after Beacon—she said that she pushed you away, that your dad was focused on her, that Qrow was in-and-out of your house…” Her expression softened as she watched Ruby. “If you need to—or if you just _want_ to talk about whatever’s on your mind… I’ll listen.”

                Ruby remained motionless, silent, for what felt like ages. She couldn’t think of what she wanted to say, she couldn’t even identify her emotions at the moment—she could only clench and unclench her fist around the fabric of her cape as her thoughts raced.

                “You don’t have to, like I said, if you don’t want to.”

                Another few minutes of silence pursued Blake’s reassurance. Eventually, however, Ruby spoke with surprising meekness. “I don’t know what I’m feeling. It hurts.” She whispered, shutting her eyes tightly. “It hurts my chest, and it makes it hard to breathe, and it makes my heart race but ache at the same time—my body feels so heavy, and I feel so tired, and—” Large tears started to stream down her face, and as she continued, her voice cracked. “I miss Pyrrha, and I miss Penny, and I know Penny’s out there—but I don’t know what to do.”

                She froze for a second, tears dripping down and staining her cape. “I know we're not getting Pyrrha back—I know we can't. But Penny is different. She wasn't a human, she wasn't a faunus, and I _know_ we can get her back, I _know_ what I saw. It wasn't a hallucination, it wasn't wishful thinking—she was _there_.”

                Blake gave a small nod, pulling Ruby closer with the one arm she had kept around her. She waited in silence for a moment, to see if Ruby was going to continue talking, and when she found that she was just going to cry quietly, the occasional gasp or hiccup escaping her lips, she began to speak again. “Weiss started talking to Ironwood today, but if we don’t hear anything about meeting with Penny’s father tomorrow morning, then we can go out ourselves—as a team—and look for Penny. Alright?”

                “Blake, everyone thinks that I’m delusional, they think I’m seeing things, that I’m imagining her—”

                “Because stress _does_ that to people, Ruby.” Blake’s voice lowered. “We’ve been through _hell_ —you know that. You don’t just… Get out of what we’ve been through unscathed physically and mentally.”

                Ruby paused—thinking about what was being said, even if only for a moment. She nodded slowly, her eyes moving around Blake’s face as she did so. “You… You’re right. You’re right, Blake.”

                “We’re here for each other—as a team. And I think a few of our old friends and new friends are here for us, too… We’re here for you, Ruby. All of us are.”

                “Thanks, Blake.” Ruby relaxed against the other, slowly shutting her still-damp eyes. “I think I’m ready to go back to bed soon.”

                “Want me to carry you?”

                “Nah, I can make it.”

 

                Dawn broke, and the first to rise—as always—was Weiss. Followed by, for once, Yang—who was usually the third to wake up, right after Blake.

                “Ruby and Blake sure are sleeping in.” Yang murmured, donning her prosthetic and flexing it, making sure it was attached properly. “How long has it been since we’ve seen Blake sleep in?”

                “They were talking late last night.” Weiss sat back down on the edge of the bed, a cup of coffee held tightly between her hands. “I heard them in the hallway—I don’t know what about, though.”

                “Geez, they know we have to get up early…” Yang said, sitting down next to Weiss. “Hey, about how dark did you make that coffee?”

                “I used four of the complementary packets.”

                “Damn, babe. That’s a bit much, isn’t it?”

                “Not really.” Weiss rolled her eyes and laughed softly, slowly bringing her legs up under her as she moved to lean against the other.

                A quiet groan, followed by the sound of shifting fabric, came from behind them; it wasn’t Ruby, but Blake. “How early is it?” She groaned, pushing herself up and glancing behind her, at the still-sleeping Ruby Rose. “How late did I sleep in?”

                “You slept in by about two hours.” Yang said, tilting her head back to look at the visibly-tired Blake. “You can sleep in for awhile longer? We always do when we first get into a town, you know that.”

                “I’ll just… Stay awake.” Blake arched her back, her bones cracking and snapping with the movement; she relaxed when the noises ceased. “I got enough sleep.”

                “Did Ruby?” Weiss asked, shooting a worried glance in her direction. “I know you two were up late…”

                “I think she did, eventually.” Blake murmured, scooting to sit next to Weiss and Yang. “Has General Ironwood called you?”

                “No… Not yet.”

                “Then I’m going out with Ruby for awhile today. We’re going to look around town for Penny.”

                “Really?” Yang jumped into the conversation again; she raised a brow at Blake.

                “If she’s right, then we find Penny again; if she’s wrong, we might be able to help her find closure—just in case we can’t get ahold of Penny’s dad.” Blake glanced over her shoulder at Ruby once again before redirecting her gaze at Yang and Weiss. “It won’t hurt anything.”

                “You’re right… But—”

                “There’s nothing to _but_ about, Weiss.” Yang interrupted, running a hand through her own hair. “Blake’s right. On the off-chance that Penny did get rebuilt or something, if we find her, we find our friend again. If not… We might be able to help my sister get closure.”

                Weiss hesitated, but nodded in agreement; she downed the last of her coffee and passed the mug to Yang so that it could be placed on the bedside table. “Are we all going to look, then?”

                “Yeah—I’ll tell my uncle that we’re just going out to familiarize ourselves, and we can let Oscar, Ilia, Sun, and the others chill for the day.” Yang stretched her arms above her head and tilted her neck from side-to-side, earning rather loud, uncomfortable pops.

                “I need to talk to my girlfriend before we leave, alright?” Blake slowly stood, a small smile forming on her lips. “I don’t want her and Sun to worry about where we are. Since Ruby’s asleep, I’ll go ahead and do that now.”

                “I’ll stay here with Ruby.” Weiss said, her gaze shifting between the two. “I don’t want her to wake up alone.”

                “Gotchya.”

                “We’ll both be back soon, Weiss.” Blake smiled, giving Weiss a small, silent ‘thank you’ nod before walking to the bathroom.

                “Kiss?”

                “Please? Weiss smiled, straightening her back to get a bit taller—a minor attempt at meeting Yang halfway.

                Yang took note, and once she leaned down, planted a soft, featherlight kiss on Weiss’s lips before kissing her cheeks and forehead. “Be back soon. I love you.”

 

                Ruby groaned loudly from behind Weiss, and she pulled a pillow over her head as she curled more tightly into a ball. “What time is it?” She hissed.

                “About noon. Blake is talking to Ilia, and Yang’s taking a shower before she talks to your uncle.” Weiss turned around on the bed, and she gently pulled the pillow away from Ruby. “We’re going out today—Blake said that you wanted to look for Penny?”

                Ruby bolted upright at the mention of _her_ name—she was tense and her eyes were wide when she swiveled around on the mattress to face Weiss. “What did you say?”

                “I said that we’re going to look for—”

                “Really?” Ruby’s face lit up. “So, you believe me? You think that she’s okay, too?”

                Weiss attempted to hold her morning-smile and hopeful expression together, but could feel her forehead wrinkling with concern—she only prayed that it didn’t tell on her furrowed brow, and that her bangs hid her forehead from view.

                “We’re going to try and find her, Ruby. There’s… No real guarantee that we will.”

                “But you’re still _trying_. I thought it was just… Gonna be me and Blake. I’m so glad that you’re all gonna help.” Ruby threw her arms around Weiss’s neck and held back relieved, hopeful tears; a relaxed sigh passed through her lips as Weiss slowly put her arms around her, returning the hug.

                Weiss held back her own tears, though they were formed for a different reason—she knew this bright, hopeful girl was about to be crushed once again by the cruel twists this world had to offer.

_We’ll be there for her. We’re all here for her, and we’re going to be supportive._ She reassured herself, holding in a deep breath. She slowly, steadily released it, as she held the other in her arms.

                Weiss spoke again after a few minutes, pulling away from the other's warm, tight embrace. “Bundle up? It's already cold out, and I'm pretty sure it's supposed to rain.”

 

                It didn't take long for everyone to get ready; Yang's story of Team RWBY going out to familiarize themselves didn't really stick to Qrow, but he waved his nieces and teammates off regardless before sinking back inside.

                Ruby was the only one walking forward with purpose and her head held high; the other three remained slightly behind her, their eyes locked on her back—occasionally, they would exchange glances.

                The truth was, none of them even knew where to begin to look—not even Ruby, despite her confident and reassured gait. Ruby was just going off of speculation, what she saw before, and the prayer that somewhere she would find a reference to, at the least, the last name _Polendina_.

                “We'll look for awhile, and then we'll stop off for food, alright?” Yang said, reaching out to lightly brush her hand against her sister's arm. “We can't focus on an empty stomach—plus, good food helps raise spirits and shit.”

                “We'll keep looking after that, though, right?” Ruby halted, feeling her sister lightly grasp her sleeve. “Like, we just... Won't call it quits?”

                “Nah, we'll look every free day that we have here.” Yang grinned, using this as an opportunity to pass Ruby by; as she walked past, she raised her hands behind her head. “Trust me, if you say you saw her, then we'll look every single second we can.”

                “We might not find her, but... We'll try our best to.” Weiss offered a kind smile. “It's what teammates are for.”

 

                It didn't take long for hunger to set in on the four—and it didn't take long for the rain to pick up, either. The chilly region's rain was no joke—though they had made it inside of a street cafe just in time, they were still slightly dampened, shivering, and starved to tears.

                “I'll order our drinks—Weiss, can you bring the food when they call our order?” Blake stood from the table, looking between the other three—Ruby and Weiss both frowning, shivering, and clinging to Yang in the one seat of the booth.

                “Do I have to?” Weiss groaned, still attempting to leech off of Yang's heat. “Seriously, you're already up.”

                “I think I want a turn sapping some of Yang's warmth, too.” Blake said, rolling her eyes and offering a small smile at Weiss. “Plus, you'll have your coffee by then.”

                “... Alright, fine.” Weiss huffed, hiding her own smile. “I _guess_ I can get the food in a few minutes.”

                “Thanks.” Blake said, turning her back on the booth and stepping away from it.

                “So, Weiss.” Yang pulled Weiss and Ruby closer, keeping her arms loosely over their shoulders. “Any messages or calls from General Ironwood?”

                “Still nothing.” Weiss murmured, her gaze shifting briefly over to Ruby. “I just... Hope he's alright. It's not like him to just ignore me.” She started to speak again, but slowly shut her mouth and stared at the lit-up scroll left on the table. _He's more like a father to me than my actual father._ She added silently, almost bitterly. _He's just busy. That's all. So is my sister._

                “You worried about them?” Yang asked, shooting a concerned glance at the other. “It's fine if you are, honestly.”

                “You know I am, Yang. Especially about Ironwood...” Weiss sighed quietly, her hand slowly finding Yang's and clinging to it.

                “Here's the drinks.” Blake said quietly, squeezing into the group huddle on the other side of Ruby. “They said the food will be ready in just a few.”

                “Sweet.” Yang was the first to take her drink—her arms left the shoulders of Ruby and Weiss, and she held the drink close to her before taking a sip. “Thank god. You two were gonna just steal all of my warmth.”

                “Psh, you'd still be warm.” Ruby grinned a bit, now taking her own cup. “You're like a living heater.”

                “So, what's the plan?” Yang leaned back into the cushy seat of the booth before moving her eyes around to scan each face of her teammates. “We aren't just... Gonna head back after this, right?”

                Ruby immediately jolted up, her drink wobbling wildly in the cup and nearly spilling slightly over the edge—it calmed with her before it had the chance to, though. “No! We can't, we have to keep looking.”

                “It's pouring the rain—we should wait here for a little bit before we head out again.” Blake sighed softly, reaching out to touch Ruby's arm with one of her hands. “We aren't giving up—you said you saw her. We trust you, and we're going to keep trying to find her for as long as we can.”

                “I think there's a store close to here? It might be on the other side of the street, though.” Weiss added in, her hands still wrapped around the mug—of course, she was still attempting to sap its warmth. “If one of us goes over there, we could probably find an umbrella.”

                Nobody raised their hand to volunteer going, silence filled the room for a brief moment. Weiss broke it with a cough, looking between her teammates. “Well?”

                “We don't exactly know our way around town, Weiss.” Blake sighed quietly, a small grin formed on her lips. “I'm sorry, it looks like it's up to you to fetch the umbrella.”

                “Blake, you devious little--”

                “Psh, come on. I'll go with you, Weiss? You can latch onto me, use me for warmth?” A sly smile formed on her lips. “I can _definitely_ keep you warm.”

                Weiss's face immediately turned blood red, and she could feel all of the heat her body had to offer surface there; Ruby, on the other hand, grimaced with a very quiet 'Eugh'.

                “Please don't make out in an alleyway, you two.” Blake said quietly. “I'll stay with Ruby, then?”

                “That sounds like a good idea.” Weiss smiled again, the blush slowly leaving her face. “We'll go after we eat? Our food is probably ready.”

 

                It was pointless, in the end; the four searched as far as they could, even splitting into two groups once the rain had let up to cover more ground, but they found nothing. After night fell, when the clock started to tick down to midnight, they had made their way back to the hotel to curl up for the night—of course, all in the same bed.

                Watching Ruby's heart go from hopeful to broken over the course of the day had left the other three exhausted, emotionally tired and heartbroken themselves—this small ball of love and life, full of nothing but pure hope had wound herself down looking for the girl she loved more than anything.

                Everyone knew how badly it hurt when Blake ran from them—but Weiss and Ruby had faith that she would come back, they always knew she would come back. Even if it took longer for Yang to be convinced that she would come back, she eventually grew to trust that she would come back—it didn't stop the pain, it didn't erase it all, but the hope they felt made it a little bit more bearable.

                With Penny, who they saw torn to shreds, with no word of rebuilding her from Ironwood or from her father, there wasn't as much certainty. There was just blind hope.

                It didn't take long for Ruby to fall asleep; her face tear-stained, and her breathing still ragged from her muffled crying. Of course, Weiss, Yang, and Blake sat next to her, holding her, stroking her hair, rubbing her back, singing softly—they did whatever they could to try and soothe her, but nothing seemed to work. The few times that she did speak, she apologized, or just said Penny's name.

 

                Though it didn't take her long to fall asleep, she didn't sleep long. With the scene of Penny being severed, and the image of Pyrrha gasping for breath before being blown away all replaying over and over in her head, how could she sleep for long?

                When she jolted up, hyperventilating and shaking, her team jerked up as well—all of them rising from a dead slumber to gently ease Ruby back down and shush her, talk to her, and calm her until she felt as though she could sleep again.

                They all had their share of night terrors—they all had their own demons haunting their dreams, but for the most part, Ruby had these experiences more frequently than the others. Excess stress just seemed to trigger that.

                “Guys,” Weiss yawned, still sitting on the edge of the bed. “I'm going to go and get some water. Do you want anything?”

                “No, thanks.”

                “I'm good.” Blake raised her head to look at her, a small, worried smile visible through the dim lamp light. “Bring an extra bottle of water back for Ruby, though?”

                “Of course. I'll go out in just a minute...” Weiss reached over to the nightstand to slide her scroll off and open it. She grimaced in the bright, blue start-up light, but slowly flicked through her notifications anyway. It was only when she saw the words _New Message: General Ironwood_ did her eyes widen.

                “Weiss? Hey, what's up?” Yang slowly raised herself and peeked over her shoulder. “Oh, shit, Ironwood? What's it say?”

                “I haven't opened it yet. I just--” Weiss glanced back at Ruby, and then at her scroll. “I'm scared. What if it's not... What if they haven't rebuilt Penny?”

                “Well. We don't know yet.”

                “You're right...”

 

                The four slept in—much later than before—and somehow, they all rose at the same time. The first to signal that they were awake was, in fact, Ruby, with a loud, uncomfortable groan. “I'm so tired, you guys.”

                “No wonder.” Yang mumured, reaching an arm over Weiss to ruffle Ruby's hair. “Wanna get breakfast?”

                “We should definitely talk over breakfast.” Weiss interjected, lightly batting at Yang's arm. “Don't reach over me.”

                “Aw, do you want to be held? Not just reached over?”

                “No.” Weiss turned her head away, her cheeks puffed out slightly. “... Only a little.”

                “If we're going to talk over breakfast, then we should go ahead and get ready.” Blake chimed in—it seemed as though she curled herself up more under the blankets as she spoke. “I really don't want to get up, though.”

                “C'mon, we gotta. We're going out to find Penny again.” Yang grinned.

                It grew silent, if only for a moment. “What's the point?” Ruby spoke softly, her voice shaking. “We're not going to find her.”

                “Ruby, hey.” Yang's grin slowly turned into a frown as she nudged her sister's shoulder. “You. Get up. Go get dressed.”

                “There's no point to keep looking. She's dead.”

                “Okay, and? She could've also been rebuilt.” Yang nudged Ruby again, earning a frustrated groan.

                “That's actually what we're going to talk about.” Weiss added. “It's... Ruby, just get dressed. I don't want to talk about this before we eat. Then we'll _never_ get to eat.”

                Ruby huffed, slowly easing herself up. “Fine, fine, whatever.”

 

                Good food definitely helped Ruby's mood—she was smiling and talking more when they had started to eat—it was only when Weiss sat down that Blake and Yang became more serious.

                “Wait, are we talking about this now?” Weiss looked between the two. “I haven't even gotten a chance to start eating.”

                “Just tell her, c'mon?” Yang softly elbowed Weiss's ribs, a gentle and rather convincing smile forming on her lips.

                “Alright, well...” Weiss took a sip of her coffee, and a very deep breath, before speaking. “We're meeting with General Ironwood today. In about two hours.” She pulled her scroll out and slowly slid it over to Ruby, the message open to her.

_I'm glad to hear that you've arrived safely, Miss Schnee. As for what your teammate says, there is actually a chance that she has seen Miss Polendina in a crowd. Her father has been trying to keep this as a very private matter, but I'm sure that he wouldn't mind if I were to take her out and let her see you again._

_I have to warn you, though, and please make sure you—as well as your teammates—are all aware that things may not be the same as they were. She doesn't remember anything that happened at Beacon—nor does she remember anything before that._

_If you're available, we can meet in the Atlas communication tower at around three. I have full control of where Miss Polendina is allowed to go, and as long as I am escorting her, it's cleared with her father._

 

                Ruby stayed silent, staring at the wall of text on Weiss's scroll long after she had finished reading it. The other three shared glances before resting their gaze back on her, hoping she would move, hoping she would react—hoping that she would say something, anything.

                She didn't say anything—not at first. She just started crying silently, her lips curled upwards in a slight, hopeful smile. She stayed crying silently for a moment, her tears barely missing the screen of the scroll. “She... She's okay, she's alive.”

                “But she might not remember us... Ruby, are you going to be alright with that...?” Blake slowly rested a hand on Ruby's shoulder, giving her a gentle squeeze before pulling her close.

                When her face collided with Blake's shoulder, Ruby shut her eyes and relaxed, drawing a deep breath. “Y-yeah—I'll be okay. I'll be better than okay, she's alive. It's her.” Ruby's eyes, though still filled with relieved, happy tears, lit up and danced as she pulled away from Blake. “Even if she doesn't remember me, I can be her friend again—in one of the books Yang would read to me as a kid, friends were connected by their souls, and I... I think that's true.”

 

                They got to the tower early—they had cut breakfast short, not because Ruby asked, but because they wanted to hurry and see their old friend—they wanted Ruby to see her, they all wanted to hear her voice, see her, hug her—just to make sure this wasn't some cruel dream that each of them had individually come up with.

                Of course, Ironwood wasn't there yet. The communication tower was mostly shut-down, seeing as the only communication that could go in and out was local, there was no need for the upper floors.

                “Weiss, are you gonna cry?” Yang pulled Weiss and Blake closer—the advantage of sitting in the middle of her two girlfriends on the bench was that she could have her arms over both of their shoulders.

                “No.” Weiss scoffed, rolling her eyes.

                “She's totally going to cry.” A teasing smile played on Blake's lips. “But... We're probably going to cry, too.”

                “Damn right, we are.”

                Every time the front doors rotated, Ruby quickly looked over, hoping, praying that it would be Ironwood with Penny.

                It finally was. And of course, Ruby didn't spare a single second—she jumped to her feet, bounding over and throwing her arms around Penny's waist to lift her as much as she could.

                Lifting her now was a lot easier than the first time she had done it—when she had scooped her up and ran away from some Atlesian guards. Was it because of the new material they had used, or was it just because Ruby had grown stronger?

                Regardless, Penny had barely changed—her hair had been styled differently, and her face had a more round, softer appearance—as well as dozens more of those adorable freckles that Ruby loved.

                When Ruby gentle placed her back on the ground, she took Penny's hands and drew a shaky breath.

                “I missed you. I missed you so, so much.”

                “I'm sorry... But... Who are you?” Penny's voice remained calm, though curious; she leaned forward, investigating Ruby's teary, silver eyes, and trembling bottom lip more closely.

                Despite her inspections, she couldn't find any memory regarding this face.

                But god, something welled up in her mechanical heart. It was powerful, overwhelming, really—she didn't know this girl's name, she only knew that she was more than familiar.

                “Penny, you don't remember me, but my name is Ruby Rose—a lot... A lot of stuff has happened over the past few years, but... We were friends.”

                Penny's voice came out slow, almost deliberate. “Ruby... Rose?”

                “Yeah! We were best friends and I--” Ruby slowly moved Penny's hands to her cheeks, relaxing at the touch. “I knew a lot about you. We talked about everything. And I want to be friends with you again, even if you don't remember anything about me.”

                “Oh, no, I do remember something.” Penny smiled brightly at the other, moving to press her forehead against hers. “I remember that I loved a Ruby Rose with everything that I am. I know that's you.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> I started this long, long oneshot before I moved out. And Now. Now. It's finally done.


End file.
